Barfi The Murphy!

This movie is a lot. It’s something that tears the fourth wall of the screen and lands on your face as a shameless smile. It heralds itself with the song “Ho Gayi Pichur Shuru”, announcing that the movie is starting, so shut the hell up and watch it with your “mobiles and kids switched off”. Yes, the song ACTUALLY asks you to do that. It’s like you are watching a Shakespearan play with the narrator asking you to shut the fuck up. You begin with a smile that wears off only when you leave the theatre. Nay! Nay! A thousand times nay! I am writing this and I’m still smiling. Then, comes utter silence as the screen turns into a portrait. Yes, from Shakespeare, Anurag Basu jumps to being a Monet, as he shows us such a view of Darjeeling that would make you want to live in his head! Writer to a fucking painter. In just one bloody frame. Son of a gun!

The movie is Ranbir Kapoor’s smile. The movie is Ranbir Kapoor’s frown. The movie is every emotion that the eyes of Mr. Ranbir Raj Kapoor emote. Duuude! If Rockstar was only Ranbir’s character, then Barfi is a kaleidoscope of myriad dreams and Ranbir is one such dream. He does not take over the movie, nor does he leave it. But we know, without him it just wouldn’t be the same. With the only dialogue being a bark that somehow goes ‘Barfi!’, Ranbir passes onto the next level of acting.

Throughout the movie, you cannot quit smiling. At times you laugh at the Chaplinism of the movie, at times, you cringe as Priyanka Chopra clings on to Barfi’s pinky finger and sleeps! At times, you wanna cry. Yet.. Yet.. You do not stop smiling! What the hell? Not cool, bro! Not cool! One cannot make a movie where you only smile. In the age of surrealism, existentialism, Batman-ism and sleazy, porn-star- turned-actor-ism, it’s just plain wrong to make a simple movie with such care!

You can feel the effort emanating from the screen. Every shot beautifully painted. Yes. Painted. Has to be. Every narration sweetly ordained. It’s just sheer orgasmic pleasure of the beautiful kind, when you see imagination come to terms with reality, delivered with such delicacy. Wow!

The movie definitely has certain western movie influences. Like the out of the blue orchestra that plays the background score perched up in unlikely places. The music. Pritam Bhaiyya, I cannot believe you did this. If you haven’t flicked the music, then you are gifted with true art. And if you HAVE flicked this, then you have good taste! How in the name of lord did he come up with such music? The music is so perfect it somehow fills the void of dialogues and you never notice the lack of dialogues.  

And then, finally. Priyanka Chopra. Shahrukh, learn something from her. THIS is called autism. I think Karan Johar should remake ‘My Name is Khan’ as ‘My Name is Chopra’. Kareena, with your sleazy ‘Heroine’ coming up, you cannot even dream to match up to this woman. First of all it’s a movie by Madur Bhandarkar. And secondly, you cannot act. Priyanka. Yes, she knows what acting is! And come to think of it, Kareena and Priyanka are considered to be rivals. I am sorry Bebo. The biggest achievement you will ever have in your life would be sleeping with the Nawab of Pataudi! I am not gonna insult Priyanka’s performance by commenting on it. Just go watch.

Illeana is there somewhere in the movie. Just there.

And now, the plot. So simple. So nice. But somehow, it touches you and not in the dirty way! It shows how love is- Unconditional. The truth of life does not taste bitter if you do not know what sweet is. The bitter IS your sweet. And that’s what the movie shows. When you try and measure up love, you are bound to lose everything you have because love does not make sense and the minute it does, it’s not love anymore.

Make one more good movie, and I shall forgive you for ‘Kites’, Anurag Basu. As of now, respect. Plain ol’ respect to you!